I've always suffered from one simple problem. I thrive on a new challenge, a new task, a new venture, a new project, a new activity or a new job. But then once I've mastered it and completed it, or feel as though I know it very well and it is no longer a challenge, I get bored, restless and look for something new again. This is a bit of a curse for people like me with 'busy brains', the constant need for stimulation, for excitement, for change, for new things, the need to 'work it out'. This is a battle, for we are always seeking that buzz, that need for accomplishment, for learning something new. I enjoy having a 20 track mind, but I have to say, there are many times I wish I wasn't so much in need of things to keep it occupied.
Having said that, I am also strictly a creature of habit, sticking firmly to a very regimented routine. I like structure, order, discipline and often follow the same pattern each week in an attempt to manage my family and my life in general. But when this all gets very monotonous, I start to get frustrated, aggravated, agitated and know that I have to make a change somewhere in this pattern to get that happy vibe flowing through me again.
Now I don't blame my 'bored, neurotic housewife status' (that many must think I have), on this dilemma, no, not at all. Anyone that has half a clue will know that there is A LOT of work involved in raising 3 kids. I made the choice many years ago to sacrifice a 'high flying, corporate career' for my life as a wife, mother, care giver, chief cook and bottle washer. And this is all good, believe me, I wouldn't change this for the world and honestly have no regrets about this. It is a personal challenge, a need to create, explore, excel, develop, expand that I am talking about today, a need to improve, refine the way I do things and to keep active and satisfied, both physically and mentally.
It doesn't help that it is cold and grey at home where I live, either. Or the fact that I face the never ending problem of paying my bills and never being able to find much 'play money' at the end of each week. But I'm sick of using these things as excuses, it's time to grab the bull by the horns and get moving, get motivated again, solve these 'problems' and get on with it! So now, what to do? What to do?
I am very fortunate to have a wonderful support network in my family and close friends who know me very well. They understand my annoying complexity and always help me work things through, each in their own way. I have people around me that help me understand myself and also give me encouragement and ideas. I know one thing for sure is that I will always need people, people to laugh, sing, dance and sometimes even cry with, to kiss and hug, for there is no way I would survive in isolation.
This is all often easier said than done, for finding the motivation to actually get up, get moving and get started is harder than completing the task. But I will do it, you know I will. I'll just repeat to myself, 'I think I can, I think I can' and then soon enough, I'll be doing it. I'll make sure that I don't neglect my responsibilities, but I'll give myself some new wings to stretch and fly a little bit further.
It will take time, it always takes time, but slowly and surely, I'll work through it, chip away at it bit by bit and make something out of 'it'. Positive self talk, people, never underestimate the power of positive self talk! Works a treat.
Well, there we have it, I think I've just created myself a little plan.......and I feel better, too! I've let it all out and worked it through. Where would I be without my beloved blogs? Works for me every time.
Thank you for taking the time to read this, I hope you can relate in some way, or maybe I have given you a little bit of encouragement and motivation too. Or maybe you are smiling and thinking, 'There goes Laura again on one of her missions!' I vent, then I blog, then you read and then we are both happy. Until next time, stay warm, stay groovy and always walk on the sunny side of the street :) xxx